david banach response #2

Banach's argument is that we find things to blame when we do not succeed. This is completely true. It is very rare to see someone not find an excuse for their failure. We only do this because it is the easiest way out and relieves us of a large ammount of guilt. Wayne Dyer has a book called change your thoughts, change your mind. For a large portion of it he talks about fault and blame. He tells us "All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you." To an extreme measure, blame can be compared to using alcohol or drugs as a temporary solution to depression and sadness. For a period of time the blame, and even the alcohol will relieve and distract you from reality. At the end of the day though, you will have to face it that blaming someone only put a halt to your progress as an individual. You put your faults and flaws on someone or something else because of the mere fact that you were not able to admit to yourself that you were not good enough.
Banach goes deeper in how people no longer realize that they have the power to decide who they are. This reminds me strongly of the commercial for anti drugs that claim we should be above the influence. Personally, i have never met anyone in my life who is above the influence of other people. To some extent we all are. Women started wearing ugg boots because they saw other women wearing them just as men began wearing nike dunks because they saw other men wearing them. These days it is near impossible to be original. Every person we meet we act different around. We meet someone famous we act polite, we meet someone rude we act rude back, we meet a goodlooking man or woman we try to impress them by acting different. This is why love rarely works. A man meets a woman and she becomes crazy for him. In reality though she is crazy for the image and mask he put on for her. Sooner or later she will discover the real man and maybe wont be so impressed. She will often claim that he has changed since they met and that he is not being himself. The irony in this is that when he finally does become himself she is surprised.